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, 06/13/2010
| "So while it is true that souls of Atzilut (i.e. souls that retain their Divine Atzilut personality even as they come down below), like Moses and the elders, have the ability to awaken in all of us this awareness and power, yet, they awaken in us a power they lays latent – but is inherent – in every fiber of our beings." I LOVE THIS.. IT IS WHAT I AM. thanks!! for sharing your writing..only the very essence of what G-d is can overcome dividing walls ---where all is one from origin.
 | Avraham Yehoshua Kahana, 06/11/2010 One more thing | In case I did not make any point in the message I have just sent, here is what I should have asked:
I don't understand/my understanding can't accommodate the world being created. Anything being created means the creator needing it created, to fulfill whatever purpose it designs it to or whatever else you want to argue - but doesn't seem we will accept a creation was created for no reason. God needs nothing, so if, at all, any creation would be needed, they won't be for Him. Next obvious step is: how can something be destined to fulfill the need of things that do not yet exist.
And there is no such answer here as "Because there was no way those things could be created before", no - because it leads me back to "then why would a non-needing entity (God) "need" to create needing entities at all. None of them (the "needing" entities (humans, plants, rocks, life, earth, planet)) ever asked to be created, thus never ever uttered a single request of needing this or that for them.
Shabat Shalom
 | Avraham Yehoshua Kahana, 06/11/2010 Central role | Rabbi, allow me to shift to a different topic - for I did not understand the current article (I missed the Atzilut
thing, I did not read the previous article), but on the other hand I was granted the chance to read the formidable
text in your article:
"We were never given the right to question whether we can accomplish the mission; we were only charged with the job
of figuring out how to do it."
I have to say - I have been stuck in this issue for almost the very first day I decided to "go back home", as I
call a jew returning to Torah. Everything I study, every question that pops in my mind - ultimately stem from the
following issue: who's the central figure in my life ? Is it supposed to be God ? Or is there any chance that I can
regard myself as playing the main role in my own world ?
Let's elaborate. Let's deliberate on the 2nd hypothesis - for it is the easiest to think of. Would there be any
other reason for my existence if not for my own sake ? If not for my personal fulfillment ? It's funny, as I
explore this question and the aforementioned answers come in I feel they don't sound like an answer, because they
do not seem to fit in the Jewish understanding of life. (I just ask you to please picture myself not as a
materialistic / material-oriented person, since I believe I am not or at least I am not anymore. Not the normal
"live the moment !" type, but certainly not a tzadik (was I one I assume I would not be asking these things. Think
of myself as a very simple "chozer be tshuva", who tries to climb the ladder one very small step at a time).
Back to our discussion, let me now try to ponder on the 1st hypothesis - even with me not being able to clearly
answer the 2nd one, this is where my real problem lies - for I can't even scrap half an answer to it.
Assuming God is the center of my world, of my life - I presume the obvious conclusion would be that I should live
according to his will. Eventually I will come across the idea that His will is what is best for me. (I need to stop
here, because for every single sentence I write 4 new questions or considerations pop up in my mind - I originally
planned to leave you a comment, so...).
If it is right that I am supposed to live according to His will - (I am obliged to say that my mind asks me to
write "worse, that I was given the option of choosing or not to live according to his will - while choosing not to
seems the wrong thing to do !!!") - if I'm supposed to live according to his Will - if that's the case - first, the
very first, obvious, that utterly begs for the smallest glimpse of an answer: why would it be the case - that God
NEEDS me to live according to His Will.
One might say: who told you he needs you ? He has many others. You're not the center of the universe. Yet, that
does not help, if I think - and doesn't seem to me so far-fetched a thing - to assume many others pose this very
same question.
Perhaps I am focusing in the wrong spot. Problem might not be with "me", but with "need". Indeed, again, I left
the most difficult for later. Now what I am left with, to answer myself - how is it possible that God needs ???
This puts the whole system down. The whole world, the whole of humanity, the whole of as-many-worlds I have heard
of that comprise the universe. Whatever is it that God would eventually need - in case I get past the needing
issue - he would never ever need anything but him to accomplish that.
One might come now and say: but wait a minute, dear, who told you He is looking for something for Him ? Now comes
the big revelation, the secret you are missing: He is looking for something for you !!!
How can this make any sense ?! How can God know what I want ? Overtly, He knows it better than me - since He is the
one who fashioned and I am the creation (a computer "knows" nothing about what he "wants", he just does it because
this is how it was programmed to do so, according to the will of his "creator" (the one who "forms"/"gives him
life"/"instills in him purpose") - but, then again, if He way better than I knows what I want - how can He ever
claim He wants my good if He created me with a conscience that seeks day after day what is it that I want/what is
the purpose - and yet did not give me the understanding of it ((there are several other ways of posing this, just
like most of everything I wrote so far) or did want me to toil to get their myself so I would finally fill satiated
and pleased (which, by the way, are "holes in my soul he the Creator Himself created !!!))
Well, well. All this is very ironic and "funny", actually (if we are endowed with some Jewish sense of humor - but
let us not forget that I doubt you would agree calling this funny if we think that these are factors that lead
people to todays so widespread depression and other soul-affecting illness - as happened to myself). All this
debate, all this earnest reasoning in search for understanding - understanding of how good a reason can there be
for why should you ALWAYS overcome and not stumble against all the obstacles ahead. This is only as sincere as the
realization of the incapability of the very entities that give these questions life to provide them with answers as
well.
I will stop here,
Shabbat will very soon knock at my door,
and how would I leave someone outside unattended (unless... there was no "attending" needed).
(By the way, if possible - if this text reaches you, I would like it to reach your brother Y. Y. Jacobson as well,
who wrote a brilliant article about Parashat Korach - which instilled me with eagerness again - but just like
Korach himself, I fail to nourish it/let it live for too long.)
Shabat Shalom
Avraham Yehoshua Kahana
Israel
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